dad gave me a panasonic digicam! 2 things to yeah about. 1) it's a digicam..my own! 2) it's panasonic. dad got it for my bday present which is still a long way off. my bag's gettign really really heavy. mom's been nagging me about flying to prague on the same day of arrival in stockholm. n then dad joins in too. they should realize that i'm in safe hands - the hands of God.

i dont have time to go and do my hair!! argh!!! i dont wanna leave sg with half black n half brown hair -_-" seems like doign it tomorrow is out. mm...sunday noon, after church? a bit too rush? sigh!!!! ARGH!!

I'm gonna have lunch with the classmates from the korean class and i'm so looking forward to it. :) i know there's gonna be so much fun and laughter. i just cant wait!!

i had dinner with the family - the hainanese clan! haha..and it was alot of fun. we took pics. we (the girls), took photos in nic's room. it's nice to meet up with all of them just before leaving sg. i'll miss them.

heee.i'm getting supper lazy at work. i reach late and leave early! oops!! :P

My flight's at 2155 on Sunday and already, i've been having "farewell lunch" or will have them soon. People tell me they wanna come send me off. I appreciate the good intentions but i dont want anyone to see me cry or my reddened eyes that try to control tears. My makeup's gonna be ruined and the mascara's gonna run. Hahah just kidding. But honestly, it's so nice to have people wanting to send me off but i'll be so sad. It's like... a major part of me being left behind. I already am starting to feel sad and at times, i go quiet thinking of how much i'll miss everyone. people!! i'll miss u!! please come visit me, drop me a letter(i love receivign and readign letters. it's an SAC thing), drop me an email or sign the guestbook. Keep in touch. sigh..i'll miss everyone, so much!

On a happier note, i've been more upbeat these days i think. I chat more, smile more. I have alot of stuff to do, especially preparing the readings and relevant books required over there. Things are expensive over there, so i'm trying to buy stuff here, rather than over there. i need to get more stuff. People who MIGHT wanna get me something as a parting gift, here are some hints. haha...ok, it isn't really a hint, more like a blatant request?

1) Antacids
2) Winter coat/trench coat
3) Earphone
4) Textbooks 5) Windbreaker 6) Trackpants 7) Stationery - Pens, highlighter 8) If something screws up and i need help. :P 9) Cash. 10) Prayers. Keep me in your prayers. Thank you in advance. I need the last one more than anything else. Pray that I'll be kept safe and sound, happy and joyful. I need plenty of practical stuff. I'm gettting panicky. Do i REALLY need all the different stuff i bring? Could i get them in czech instead? Last night was the last Korean lesson. Sigh..i feel this part of me being stopped. i love korean classes, i love the language. It's such a pity i wont be able to follow the rest advance to the other levels. such a pity. by the time i return, they'll be on level 5, perhaps even level 6. :( *heavy heart* I'll miss everyone of you. WRite me letters. Let me know if you want my address. I'd love to drop you a letter too! :) God bless you and keep you safe and sound. Annyong~

im so gonna miss my girls. i cant bear to part with them. i feel heartache. i took some pics with them and right now, i feel like tearing...the same feelign i get when im seperated from someone i love and cherish alot.

Bangkok hasn't really changed much from the last time i was there - in 2003. The place is still polluted, very dusty, the roadside hawkers are still everywhere, it's cheap to go shopping there (dont forget to bargain la). Oh, i saw many ah-kuas too, many thai women with caucasian men. Here's what i bought for myself: 4 long sleeve business shirts, 3 bags, lingerie, slippers, 2 bikinis and 1 lip-balm. Just what i need for the sep. we bought agnes a roxy shirt (i call it 'crapy shirt') but coz i ran out of clothes to wear, i used it before i could even give it to her :P what a bad sister i am, but still, she thought it was nice. :P heee..~~~

Seeing the thai women and the caucasian men makes me think...with money, it can buy almost everything. it can buy you a wife, a women, sex, a house, property blah blah. thailand really need the Lord. The thai are largely buddhists, worship the different kinda gods etc. Once, we were in a taxi and had stopped at the traffic light. 1 guy came with flowers, and the taxi driver took out his garland of flowers, exchanged it with the seller for a new garland and gave the guy 20baht. he prayed for a bit and then hung up the garland in the car. i was like...erm erm~~...

Well, august is approaching really really quickly, and before i realize it, i'll be waving goodbye to everyone (ok, i dont know who's gonna be there, but i think at least 3 people would be there) at the airport. Right now, i am already these feelings of ...mmm...feeling a li'l sad at having to leave everyone behind. But then, i think it's a necessary thing. I want to venture out and thus have to put all these feelings, worries and fears aside. I've always believed in "stepping out of my comfort zone. only by doing so, can i grow and learn". this is gonna be a HUUUUUge step. I really hpe it'd be a great experience. Only the Lord can make things happen. man! i cant even iron my shirts. i've decided...i'm gonna eat cereal for breakfast, sandwiches for lunch and boil everything else - veg, fish, whatever. Hee~~ :P

i went back to OG for a short while, when i went to get dinner and Bee Geok was quite shocked to see me coz i was wearing spag top and had permed hair and she couldn't recognize me. I use a cigarette case for wallet and she was shocked when she saw it coz she thought i wasn't the type to smoke. Then i was like "eh? i thought you knew? everyone knew i smoked" haha..and it was so obvious that she was so shocked. i feel bad for not telling her the truth.

darn..i havent done my korean homework. gonna tutor tomorrow before heading for work..which means almost no time to get the homework done! ~.~ i'm tired today... goodnight!

there is a possibility that i'll be going to thailand within the next 2 weeks. And...if i were to go next week, i'll be going alone! how cool is that?

while working today, i saw a really young girl, perhaps 15 years old or so. Small and petite and...pregnant. she was wearign a halter top, pink frilly and lacy, a white skirt and pinkish/whitish shoes. and i found out that a friend got a girl pregnant and the girl went for an abortion. man..i'm sad, upset and disappointed. why do things like that have to happen. if i ever were to be in such a situation, i'd have e baby no matter what. a life is a life! children aren't things of convenience. do what i think or say matter? i doubt so.

work has been quite alright. i really prefer working there rather than at OG. I get alot more freedom, have the time to read, listen to whatever music i want, work longer hours if there's a crowd, so i can earn more. i've finished reading a couple of books, somethign that wouldn't have been possible if i was still working at OG.

23 more days in singapore

i feel stagnant? there're 27 more days to the end of my vacation job and tutoring. Hopefully i can leave singapore with a decent amount of money in the bank account. I'm tired tired...but i dont have a choice. I feel a sense of weariness. I will be working till the day before i leave. I dont have a choice. i'm trapped. i'm stuck. what have i gotten myself into? is doign all these worth it? i hope so...

I've been thinking...rather, i've always wondered. When i die, at my funeral,what will people remember me as, and what will people remember me for? Will anyone even notice i'm gone? Will anyone know, or even care?

I really think... appearances are very very important. When a person is beautiful/pretty/goodlooking, he's thought of as more intelligent, more capable. people will like them, think more positively of them, respond more positively to them. Why am i so hideous? why why why

all i'm seeking for is acceptance.

i'm lookign forward to spending some time with joyce at zouk. i hope it'd be really fun! hee no drinking for us :( steph wld make a fantastic drinking partner. she's like "cheers! cheers!" and downs a drink. "cheers to our job!" and downs another. "cheers to our XXX" and there goes another shot down the shot. And oh, not just ONE SHOT, but a couple at a go. kinda stressful when i dont feel like drinking but great when i do feel like drinking. but the hangover is terrible ~ bleah~~

tomorrow's gonna be a hectic day but i hope it'd be heaps fun. take care everyone! :)

i read the papers yesterday and there was this korean couple who have 12 children. yea, no typo error. 12 kids. wow... wouldn't it be ncie to have so many kids? imagine the amount of logistics that has to be done.

went to church for the first time in weeks. ah. felt good. i'm so tired. i cant take it anymore. gnite

anyhow, i headed for work at bugis and well, it went great. sales today was quite good. could have been better but i didn't want to budge too much or else the proft margin would b so slim. my boss is really nice and generous. dont know if i've said this before but... i work at the shop called 'ADEL' at Bugis Village. It sells ladies' clothes, shoes, bags. Prices are reasonable and moreover, there's a 20% sale going on. i really enjoy workign there so i must spread the word about the shop. It's located at the air-con wing of the area. There's a foodcourt inside Bugis Village and there's a fruit juice stall along the main lane of the village. Turn left and you will see a CD shop. Walk on more and there's a turning on the right, turn in and hey presto! the shop is there. I work everyday from 2-930 on most days, except on tuesdays. i tutor too....it's draining and i feel tired very often. but one good thing is that i enjoy my work which is fantastic. haha... im working my ass off so that i can go play later. i must "ren!" i can do it!!

i was talking with meifun on the mobile while walking to work and eating my currypuff which made me like 20mins late for work haha :P work was quite fun. we were chattign and laughing away at the indian customer. she had drawn her eyebrows so thickly and downward sloping such that it looked like caterpillars. it was so funny. merri told me about it and i was like "yeah yeah" then when i saw the customer, i coudln't help laughign away. terry had to serve her and he was tryign so hard to control his laughter.

Yesterday, there were 2 ahquas who came. One went to OP, the other went to Billabong. For the OP ahkua, i was talking to shijie and then we heard a guy's voice but we wre quite sure we saw 3 women.then it dawned on us...ahkua! then a few hours later, we saw another ahkua aka Billabong ahkua. i told shijie "that's an ahkua" and she was like "really ah?" so she went over and pretended to serve her. The lady was lookign over the clothes then flicked her hair as she looked up...and then....with a deep voice said "do you have a new piece?" haha. i was like laughing away... :)

after work, i ran upstairs with terry and aunty was already waiting for us outside the building. terry's a fun person, like a little brother who talks to me. anyway, he was like "there's 6minutes before the train arrives" we always run for the train together with aunty. so together with her, we ran, or rather, sprinted all the way to the train station. terry ran SO FAST! my goodness. but it was very fun :) it's a pity that i wont be able to go home with them anymore.

i learnt something about a friend....and i'm crushed. everytime i think about it, it breaks my heart and i start to feel disillusioned. sigh`~~ what a way to end my day

hahahah this is what a friend said to me when i complained about being tired from the work and world at large. i found it damn funny and it made me laugh :) honestly, i wouldn't mind a guy proposing to me this way. hahahahaha :) too bad, it's not true and then he said "my hands are for massage to give you always when you tired haha" ....so funny...

i think i didnt get the scholarship. sigh~~~ well, at least i got one, and i shouldn't complain. i have a feelign that i will get into a conflict with charissa. her parents will be paying everything for her so she doesnt have to be so careful when it comes to spending money. on the otherhand, i will be paying everything on my own. i'd think my parents would help pay too, but i do not feel good relying on them. working in the department stores, i see people going "this", *points to a shirt*, "this shirt in M size" "that shirt in S size" etc etc...and they carry many shirts, clothes etc with them. it makes me think and wonder "wow...they can just spend, while i have to think and think for so long if i should part with just a certain X amount of money". i feel ...mm..'trapped' 'sandwiched', 'caught in between'. now i know how it feels like to be faced with a huge debt.10grand....where to get that kinda money? yea i could buy and spend, but then...it means i have to rely more on others, which i dont want. my point is, i have to watch my expenditure so closely while she can be less strict on it because it isn't her, the money comes easy. sigh~~ feel like i work my butt off..just so i dont have to rely on them. good? bad? i dont know~~ but i am tired. i just hope that the 'debt' incurred will be cleared in half a year,. i found out...with the kinda results i have, i wont be able to go on to do honours. well, i'll just go on. no biggie. hahah i just realized that i like older guys :) i wonder why...maybe it's a 'father figure' thingy? someone to replace my real dad? i dont know... ok..im going to sleep now. tired~ gnite!

i've been bingeing and that sucks a whole lot. my life these past few weeks have been quite predictable. morning - msn, go to to work, come home, msn again. I finally tutored yesterday night, afterwhich i headed for swimming. Albeit short, it was great. it felt wonderful! can't wait to get back to jogging, swimming again, once the job ends. i think the supervisors must think i'm such a terrible worker. its hard to do something well, and beyond what's required, when i do not have a passion for it. oh well...another 8days...

i wil go take a rest now. my lower back feels sore. dont know why. take care everyone. i feel happy n excited. sign my guestbook if u do swing by. cheers

i wonder if i'll be able to earn 1k+ by the time i end work. i hope so. this 1k will go towards all the various expenses for the student exchange. residence permit already costs $230. Haha..soon i will be using kronas and mentally converting everything back in SGD. i was SO happy when i could convert currency for a customer today. haha...my econs skills at work. i'm SO glad i'm doing econs. i cannot imagine myself doing anything else other than econs. plus the fact that i get to do business and technopreneurship modules to satiate my thirst for stuff like that, i am so grateful to the Lord.

i changed the date of my departure to 14th august. 1 day earlier. thank goodness i do not have to pay anything! phew~~~ i didn't realize i would arrive on 16th aug when char n myself agreed to arrive on 15th aug so we cld leave stockholm on 16th aug. heee so i changed the departure time...n i'll arrive on 15th aug, 8+am stockholm time. same destinations...czech n vienna. cool!!! ^^

While flipping through the storybooks, i was thinking "ok i'm gonna quit my job and learn korean " :) And i will do it, very soon. *heaves a little sigh* i am very touched...

Don't date because you are desperate.
Don't marry because you are miserable.
Don't have kids because you think your genes are superior.
Don't philander because you think you are irresistible.

Don't associate with people you can't trust.
Don't cheat. Don't lie. Don't pretend.
Don't dictate because you are smarter.
Don't demand because you are stronger.

Don't sleep around because you think you are old enough and know better.

Don't hurt your kids because loving them is harder.
Don't sell yourself, your family, or your ideals.
Don't stagnate.

Don't regress.
Don't live in the past. Time can't bring anything or anyone back.
Don't put your life on hold for possibly Mr/Mrs Right.
Don't throw your life away on absolutely Mr Wrong because your
biological clock is ticking.

Learn a new skill.
Find a new friend.
Start a new career.
Sometimes, there is no race to be won.
Only a price to be paid for some of life's more hasty decisions.
To terminate your loneliness, reach out to the homeless.
To feed your nurturing instincts, care for the needy.
To fulfill your parenting fantasies, get a puppy. (or a cat! )
Don't bring another life into this world for all the wrong reasons.

To make yourself happy, pursue your passions and be the best of what you can be.
Simplify your life. Take away the clutter.
Get rid of destructive elements: abusive friends, nasty habits, and
dangerous liaisons.
Don't abandon your responsibilities but don't overdose on duty.

Don't live life recklessly without thought and feeling for your family.
Be true to yourself.
Don't commit when you are not ready.
Don't keep others waiting needlessly.

Go on that trip. Don't postpone it.
Say those words. Don't let the moment pass.
Do what you have to, even at society's scorn.

Write poetry.
Love Deeply.
Walk barefoot.
Dance with wild abandon.
Cry at the movies.

Take care of yourself.
Don't wait for someone to take care of you.
You light up your life.
You drive yourself to your destination.
No one completes you - except YOU.

It is true that life does not get easier with age.
It only gets more challenging.
Don't be afraid. Don't lose your capacity to love.
Pursue your passions.

Live your dreams.
Don't lose faith in your God.
Don't grow old. Just grow YOU!

While working yesterday, a lady chatted with me. She was talking about finding a good marriage partner. She said that it was no point going for looks. What was more important were things like character and stability in job etc. I agree with her. Actually, the subject is something that has always been on my mind. A friend was informed that his previous good friend, i'm guessing his ex-gf, was getting married. i dont really know what exactly happened but he was upset. He's what i'd call an "eligible bachelor". In fact, scores of girls would throw themselves at him - good job, good education, stuff like that. But i suppose he's looking for more than just that. The lady also said that when people chose their marriage partners, it was necessary to marry someone of the same background and status. Grads marry grads, masters holders marry masters holders. And moms are very critical of their son's girlfriend! haha.. I'm so afraid i'll end up an old maid :( I dont want!!

I think it's high time for me to return to eating rice, and not just bread or noodles. I figured it's healtheir and more 'pure' coz there's less of the added chemicals. Maybe rice doesn't taste all that bad!

think i will go watch a li'l telly before preparing to leave e house. cya everyone!

I would love to have people staying over with me. The school semester ends around 22th Dec and that gives me about a week to pack up or whatever - tour...and oh! have a WHITE CHRISTMAS! i hope~~ But in anycase, i'm gonna spend my first xmas in a winter country! maybe i could go to the place where santa claus "comes" from! haha...

i'm starting to feel a bit sad at having to leave everyone behind. SSsshhh don't tell that to any of my family members. :) to keep me from being homesick...please please...come over? hahaha....

Another 2 more days of work and i'll have a day of rest! Can't wait man

i wish i had an older brother or older brothers. someone to take me as a li'l meimei & do the nice stuff older brothers do for their sisters. han oppa-ga go seepoheiyo (dont bother to understand, it's in korean)

Soemthing so dumb happened today while chatting on msn. Fries's nick said "wenshan...." so when i chatted with him, i thought it was wenshan all the while. this went on for a very long time UNTIL i asked 'do you have a bf'. the response came "bf?" n i thought she didn't know what bf was so i typed out in full "boyfriend". That's when 'she' said "boyfriend? how can i have a boyfriend" or something like that. Then it hit me. it was actually Fries, and not Wenshan! argh..
Quite funny. I was like laughing away in front of the computer.

anyway...a friend sent me this korean christian song, which is very popular. it has a pop tune, soothing, not rock that type. very nice. i really want to be able to listen and speak korean fluently. I managed to get 1.5days a week off from work so i can attend korean classes. yeahie! i just can't wait! it means i forgo some money from the sales job, but it's li'l compared to what i can get from tutoring within that time. In fact, i will attend 9 classes out of the 10 classes! at first i thought i could attend only 7 or so. I can't wait to graduate so i can head to korea to work, or to study the korean language! :) that's my plan for now, but i realize it mightn't be God's plan for me.

I realize some stuff about myself. i hate to bother about the nitty gritty stuff. i dont like to be bothered with stuff like 'stock taking' 'stock checks', thigns like that. i just want to do sales. i also am very opinionated. during the company meeting yesterday, i asked the manager a question, just like what i'd ask a lecturer. haha... i wanted to ask more but i thought..mm..better not bore the other people. they probably thought i was weird to ask such stuff. But honestly, i wanted to learn other stuff, not just to earn the money. Shifu would know.

i have to make a trip down to the swedish embassy tomorrow to apply for the residence permit. hao mafan ah~~~

okay, i'm going to bed. my hair's too long and it takes TOO long to get dried.

I applied for an internship position in china but i didn't get it. However, one good thing that came through it was that i got to know a friend's friend. To me, he's a mentor and i'm grateful for the guidance :) I did up my resume, CV, major revamp through his help.

I've been goign clubbing at least once a week - double O then zouk. i drank so much 2 weeks ago, i could barely walk properly when i got home at about 4am. through the whole night, i was tipsy and had to have smoeone guide me otherwise i'd start bumping into things. thank goodness we were in a group. well, last week, i did smoething really dumb but oh well, whats done cannot be undone. i spent the night at steph's place together with 3 others. i dozed off in the living room couch so ended up sharign the living room with the 2guys. we slept at about 5am woke up at almost 8 dozed back to sleep and got up at 9am before leaving home. steph's place is nice. mel was so sick aft dbl O that she puked and had to go home. when she opened the door, we saw puke on the floor, near the entrance. gross~ reminds me of kmy. hahahaaha drunk on hooch! :P

ok i'm goign for a meeting at the company now. anyone with job openings etc, please let me know. drop me a mail, sign the guestbook if u're reading this so i'll know u swung by.

hugs n kisses, ade

Next was a toothy grin from a baby, about 7 months old. i waved and he flashed a toothy smile..awwww... *heart melt*

I didnt have to stand too long yesterday. I was busy doing the tags for the new stock and...i forgot where i put everything! argh!!! :( I forgot where i put the new stock, resulting in the loss of a sale.

In the morning, i went down to the headquarters. it's like a company that manages many brands - Van Heusen, Daniel smething...Maui & sons. I suppose they've got the sole right to distribute it. It's quite interesting. First thing that happened was..the manager didn't zip his pants :P But that's not my point. They track weekend sales, weekly sales, monthly sales too. Oh, there're sales targets too and the most important venues are at suntec and bugis seiyu. About sales targets, when the sales team hits it, then the manager says "we targeted XX for you but you reached only YY" when in actually fact, the sales target was set at YY, so in reality, they'd actually surpassed the targeted figure.

Silly right? GRRRrrrr... i'd encourage my team, gives lotsa incentives to motivate them...hit $X and they get something..hit $Y and they get something additional.Must pay sales team well then they'll work hard for u, willingly. that's what i believe in. These people are at the front of the line. They know what's happening, keeping their ears close to the ground, they know what customers prefer, or dislike. Sure, you can replace them easily but if they are happy workers, they work hard for you when they're there.

It pays poorly but as XK says, money isnt the main focus now. Learning things should be my main priority, which i agree. I'd wanted to take on another job since the sales job starts only at 130 on weekdays. But after yesterday, I think i will give that idea a miss.

Testimony. Wonder if prayers do get answered? Well, it does. I prayed that the financial aspect for the student exchange would be taken care of and i applied for 1 scholarship, 1 travel award. And....i got the travel award which means the airfare part is taken care of! Yeahi!! :) I was jumping up and down when i saw the email. Praise the Lord. The airfare to stockholm costs about $1700-1900, not inclusive of taxes. Uh huh ..the Lord IS good. When your heart is ernest, the Lord knows it. Here's the email:

Dear Adeline,

I am pleased to advise you that the SBAS Committee has awarded you the SBAS Travel Scholarship for your trip to Sweden to study at the Stockholm School of Economics.
.......
Could you therefore please book and obtain you ticket from Scandinavian Airlines System......

Yeahie!!

I'm waiting for the reply for the other scholarship and i pray it will be successful too. Pray for me will u?

Char and myself had planned to travel europe with HH's cousin, who's also going to sweden for the student exchange but then...after meeting up with him and his friend, we've changed our minds and i still haven't called him!! -_-" oh dear...

The past few days have been quite hectic. I went for the Big Walk yesterday with Shirleen. It was great fun! This year, we started early and so when we were on the return route, there were still people walking! Last year, we waited for her friend's friend and by the time we set off, it was so sunny and few people left. -_- I'm tanner now...i have tanlines! hoho...me and tanlines..how rare is that?

I attended Dad n mom's confirmation service at COR. it was good. i was the church's photographer~~ diawwwww...i hope all the photos turned out ok! gosh....i have to brush up on my photo taking skills before i leave.

i still can't find work...argh!!! in the meantime, i've been meeting friends, going out with them, eating loads, and learning korean too. i have a few korean penpals and trying to type emails in korean is the easier part. Forming sentences in korean, and thinking in korean is the difficult part. But i must persevere!! i can do it. It can get quite embarrassing sometimes when i type words wrongly such that it becomes a vulgar word. It happened before. Could have happened many times, only that they closed one eye.

Bored bored.

Haha i really like to wear business shirts, and high heels. power eh? :P

Meeting with the camp comm members turned out real fun, as it always is. If i have to work, i'll give up the camp i guess..~~~ let's see how things go.

I feel like i need to go shopping to update my wardrobe but whatever i buy, i can only use for like..2months and then it'd be left there in the wardrobe for the next half a year. Not a good way to spend money. I'm better off using that money to tour and for the student exchange. Ohh..in case u didn't know. i'm on my way to sweden..

I wanna buy boots, comfortable yet sexy. i'm so lookin forward to getting a pair. Char came over to my place yest and we discussed and planned some stuff related to the student exchange. Well, tog with SX, tenatively, we should be going to czech and vienna for now. not too sure if we're gonna include berlin too. These places are so romantic..but too bad, no honey to go there with haha :) SX's huihui's cousin. I wonder how he's like - character and all since i haven't even met him before. babe: how's your cousin like? he seems a tad blur blur type :P

I spent about 2-3hours editing, or rather re-doing JH oppa's essay yesterday morning.(oppa means older brother in korean) haha and guess what he's gona give me in return? He said it has to be available only in korea, so i requested for something i could use in sweden coz it's cold and then i said "loop earrings" but he said i wouldn't need it... hhmmpphh so i suggested a Korean CD and yup, i believe it's on the way! yeahie! :) he spent like a 100bucks to send me a korean book to me from US. so touched!

I need to study Korean today! Must study!! I wanna converse in korean, read korean articles, email in korean!! Haha i'm going korean crazy ... "yisang hei" = crazy

I have to learn how to be humble, sincere, two of the qualities so many people remembered him for. A generousity and genuine concern for other people. He stopped schoolign at 15 and rose from a clerk to a top reporter to the president of numerous organizations, diplomat to m'sia, japan and korea and then to be president. Wow, quite an amazing feat eh?

from his wife, i'm inspired to be "the woman behind the successful man". Yea, i do want to be that pillar of support for my partner, stuff like that.

Even though i've never seen him nor interacted with him, from what the documentary clip showed, i respect him. and i feel sad... I feel proud to be Singaporean. we're small but there's integrity and dignity.

today was fun discussing exam w steph, ck and rh. heaps fun.

the exam paper turned out pretty fine. i'm glad :) no need to study also cld hv done it..i tink :) anyways...2 more to go! yeahie!

sigh..why do i always seem to have some kinda uncomfortable thingy happening to me during the exam period? well, one thing gd is that... i will be free to do watever i want, w/o bothering abt period aft the exams.

i feel awfully guilty about going for student exchange. i really want it but i feel guilty at the same time. am i being so selfish? mom's not doing well in her insurance or property line. dad..i dont know. there are bills to be paid etc etc. mom's thinking of selling the car, not having a maid. she said we cannot live the way we used to. and now...there's me with such a big financial burden to add to their troubles. i really hope i get the awards coz it will be such a huge relief.

my life needs to be fixed. i need to prioritize my needs and wants and those of others. i am a pampered, selfish brat.

After the heated quarrel with Dad, i still do not see what I did wrong. But i'm so glad at least there was an outlet i could express my frustration to - the blog and a friend. But even then, i was still too upset to talk more online. I really can't wait to leave sg. i need the freedom, the feeling of being uninhibited.It struck me that i'll have to bring lotsa stuff with me :) can't wait. i'll def brign noodles! hahaha how singaporean can i get? a good trip, being free and not doign the regular stuff in singapore, really makes me return to the usual me. wanting to talk, mix around with people, smile a lot, and being positive. i'm actually quite a bubbly person. dont know why i've become so sarcastic, negative and gloomy, melancholic.~~

Can't wait for the exams to end. Girl, you can do it!!

I can't wait for the exams to end. i'm losing steam already. Getting really bored. I wanna go party, go shopping, start learning korean full time and yes, i need to work too. CANT WAIT FOR THE EXAMS TO END....bleah bleah bleah

Truth to be, i'm looking forward to the exams. I feel prepared:P Hopefully it's not a false sense of confidence, or watever it is. Can't wait!

Your Stress Sources
Wishes to be independent, unhampered, and free from any limitation or restriction, other than those which she imposes of herself or by her own choice and decision.

Your Restrained Characteristics
Remains emotionally unattached even when involved in a close relationship.
Feels that she cannot do much about her existing problems and difficulties and that she must make the best of things as they are. Able to achieve satisfaction through sexual activity.

Willing to become emotionally involved and able to achieve satisfaction through sexual activity, but tries to avoid conflict.

Your Desired Objective
Needs to feel identified with someone or something and wishes to win support by her charm and amiability. Sentimental and yearns for a romantic tenderness.

Your Actual Problem
Seeks to avoid criticism and to prevent restriction of her freedom to act, and to decide for herself by the exercise of great personal charm in her dealings with others

haha this is quite true! especially for the partner's part. but me athletic? hahaha MAYBE~~! only that i never knew

Kim Eeji - vocal, rap
Date of birth : February 3rd, 1980
Education : Kyunghee Univ. Dept. of Dance
Height : 172cm
Weight : 51kg
Hobbies : Designing accessories, collecting perfumes

Lee Hee-jin - main vocal, rap
Date of birth : February 21st, 1980
Education : Dong-ah Broadcasting College Dept. of Theater and Arts
Height : 168cm
Weight : 44kg
Hobbies : Watching films and video

Shim Eun-jin - vocal, rap
Date of birth : February 6th, 1981
Education : Kyonggi Univ. Division of Interactive Multimedia Arts
Height : 167cm
Weight : 49kg
Hobbies : Water skiing, chatting over a cup of coffee, movies

Gan Mi-yeon - vocal
Date of birth : February 2nd, 1982
Education : Kyonggi Univ. Division of Interactive Multimedia Arts
Height : 170cm
Weight : 47kg
Hobbies : Rafting, having snacks

Yoon Eun-hye - vocal
Date of birth : October 3rd, 1984
Height : 168cm
Weight : 48kg
Hobbies : Writing letters, taking sticker-photos.

Notice their weight and height? They're quite tall AND very slim! How do they manage that?
Cosmetic surgery is very common too in Korea. Scary!!! Men and women do it. Freaky!!! I asked a korean friend if it was indeed true and he said it was a misunderstanding and then added he went for it!! I was like WHAT?!!!REALLY??? he said he had his nose and eyes done. to make the eyes larger and also to make his face sharper. i was so stunned. then said he looked better now compared to last time coz of e surgery. i actually believed but then he said he was only kidding. but honestly....i really question coz he looks quite diff from a couple of years ago. eeee SCARY. i asked another korean friend if korean girls were naturally thin and tall. he said yea and then told me his sister went for cosmetic surgery! She tattoed her brows and lips so she didn't have to do makeup and did her nose too. But my friend didn't even notice till she told him. Oh yea, this friend gave me a korean book too, from US! She touched. It totalled to like 60usd, which is equivalent to like..100sgd.

I'm so intrigued, fascinated and grossed out at the lengths to which people go to make themselves look 'beautiful'. SCARY!!!! what has the world come to? if i had to go for cosmetic surgery, i'd just go for laser for my complexion. make it less "crater face". But to change my shape, doing activities and stuff would be enough I reckon. Do dance or watever... i'm grossed out!

bleah
bleah

bleah~~~ why do i have the feeling that i'll be upset emotionally? mm...maybe instincts are right n i should trust them eh?

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